What's The Best Thing That Can Happen?
August 5, 2008 by Akemi
The empty time can be the most productive time
Happy August! I guess many of you are enjoying your vacation – especially those of you who work the corporate jobs. It’s a special time away from your busy daily life. Are you going away? Staying home to relax?
The vacation time is one of the most productive time. And I don’t mean “recharging” your battery. I say this because many of us are so busy doing what we are used to be doing, things we think we need to do because we always did them. We seldom take time to assess ourselves and our tasks. This keeps us busy, but it doesn’t necessarily make us productive.
By putting yourself away from your daily routine during the vacation, you have the opportunity to detach and review yourself. Is what you are doing something that you enjoy doing? Or is it a step to the goal you are heading to achieve?
We are always growing. Is your routine up to date to the current YOU?
The biggest waste of time is not watching a movie, not chatting with your friends, not even taking a nap. It’s living the life of someone else. Say, you have an executive position with a well-known company. You work hard, make great achievements, and get promoted. To the people looking at you, this may seem to be a wonderful life, and you are certainly productive. But if the true you is dying to express your artistic creativity, do all the busy work and consequent achievements even matter?
Perhaps the high social status was something you really wanted when you were younger. So you got your business degree and started working in suits. It worked well before – you had your wins, you learned how much you could do, all so exciting. Somewhere along the way, however, there was an internal change . . . a subtle, but real change. You grew out of that version of YOU.
Here are your choices:
1. Ignore the new YOU growing from within and stick to the YOU you and your friends and family knew.
2. Notice the new YOU and try halting its growth. Overloading yourself with busy work may work for this. Temporarily.
3. Notice the new YOU, notice it is growing, but . . . hey, what can you do? Everything is set up already for the old YOU.
4. Accept the new YOU and change your life to fit to the new YOU.
The paradox of nothingness
Is it scary to change your life to fit to the new YOU you are becoming? Do you hate the newness?
So here is your vacation. You are away from your daily routine anyway. Now don’t do anything. Really. Experience how nothingness feels.
Wherever you are spending your vacation time, embrace nothingness as much as possible. Don’t read. Don’t work on your to-do-list. Hey, you can even plug off your computer and not check the internet for the time being.
When you are completely rested and cleared, do one thing you want to do. Not something you feel you have to do. You are still in vacation, do something that is meaningful to you. The one thing that came out of this nothingness.
There. Now you are truly productive. That is the paradox of nothingness – by letting go of things, you discover the most valuable.
The question “What’s the worst thing that can happen?” is overused these days.
I’d rather ask, “What’s The Best Thing That Can Happen?”
That was what I did a year ago . . . after the summer, I quit my fulltime job and moved myself across America from Tennessee to Oregon. I’m so happy I made that change.
And I keep growing. There is always new ME forming from within, in the bubble. At this time, I don’t know what my new ME would want in life, I just hope I have the courage to follow her growth.
Bonus clue to your growth: Growth doesn’t always come in linear manner, and we don’t always have to “work” to receive something. My last week’s post was about a mini example of how the Universe provides in surprising ways. Further, I see in my business that new clients seem to show up in very timely manner.
Have you reinvented yourself before?
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On a subtler level, this growth happens all the time with clothes. One day, I find that the clothes I’ve been wearing don’t look “me” any more. I just don’t look good in it. It’s not that I really changed — I’m not getting taller or wider! Yet, I just can’t argue with the clothes that aren’t me any more. So I go shopping.
ari
Ari Koinumas last blog post..How to Apply Process-Oriented Principles in Real Life
Koinuma-san,
You are right! Everything around us — clothes we wear, the magazines we read, the decoration in our house — represent who we are, and sometimes we just grow out of what we had.
So what’s your new look like?
Well — I’m currently not going through that kind of transition right now. But the last one got me out of blues jeans (which I wore all my life up to like a year ago). Also, T-shirts don’t look good on me — it has to be shirts with collars. Go figure.
ari
I have reinvented myself several times during my life. As the new “me” evolved, my life changed, and so did my relationships. Some relationships grew stronger, some stagnated, some faded away and new relationships appeared. This inevitable side effect of personal growth is worth the joy of becoming a better me.
Flora Morris Brown, Ph.D.s last blog post..What’s Wrong with Rose-Colored Glasses?
Koinuma-san,
Hmm . . . Okay, I’ll think about fashion.
Flora,
Yes, you wrote about it in your guest post! Congrats to your courage.
Several years ago, I ran into a terrible set of circumstances at work that I couldn’t do anything about. If I had been 45 years old, I would have quit. If I had been 55 years old, I would have retired. However, I was at an age where I would lose significant retirement benefits if I didn’t stay with it until I reached retirement age.
When I reached 55, things were much better. However, I remembered how bad it had been and I was in a position where it could happen again.
So I went on vacation for 6 weeks.
When I got back from vacation, I retired. The next day I got my first pension check.
I took a full year off from work. Now I’m back working as a contractor in the same department. It’s different, though. People are always commenting on how much I smile.
The contract’s up in 30 days.
Mike Goads last blog post..Moving out of my comfort zone
Mike,
Thank you for sharing your story. It’s beautiful and very interesting. When we change, the same setting can feel so different indeed.
Hi Akemi,
This post really spoke to me.
“Accept the new YOU and change your life to fit to the new YOU.”
This is what I seem to be doing a lot lately! And it’s very scary but definitely worth it in the long run.
Anna
Hi Anna,
You go girl ^_^ We know we are always supported in the Universe.
The Law of Attraction tells us that whatever we put our energy, attention and focus on, we get more of. So when we ask “What is the best thing that can happen” we get more of that, which is a whole lot better than more of “the worst thing that can happen”.
Thanks, Tom (TRCoach)
Personal Development by TRCoachs last blog post..What is Personal Development?
Hi Akemi,
I subscribed to your blog after you posted about Laura Bennett (she’s incredible and her Embrace pet insurance has been so helpful for me and my beloved cats). I’ve been enjoying your posts, and this post has prompted me to write. I really love it. People often seem to be ‘ashamed’ of taking any time to just be within themselves, and feel they must be constantly productive in an outwardly measurable way. These are the people I find I have nothing to talk about with…(and I’m sure they feel the same about me(!) because I don’t live that way, for the most part). I say, why wait for a vacation? Make one day each week, or two hours each week, a priority for yourself…otherwise, one day you suddenly discover you do not know who you are anymore, and are not even sure where to being looking.
Your blog is calming, even when I’m rushed and frustrated with work…it reminds me of ‘reality’. Thank you.
Tom,
Yes! Thank you for pointing out how it relates to the Law of Attraction.
Mo,
Thank you for your kind beautiful words for my blog . . . hugs to you.
I’m glad you are taking care of yourself so well. Yes, ideally, we take time to be calm and to listen to our inner voice on a daily basis — and further, the awareness becomes constant backtone. I just thought maybe some really “busy” people can get a taste of that calmness using the vacation time.
I feel so encouraged with all the great comments! I’ll work on writing more and more of good posts — while I take time for meditation ^_^
Akemi,
I’ve been trying to ‘learn’ meditation for years but I live on a very busy (NOISY) street which has caused me to give up several times. Thank you for the reminder…I will try and try again!
I hope your meditation is being good to you.
I am sorry if I implied that using vacation time for tasting calmness was less than enough – you are so right, and vacation is the time for very busy people to try to take time for themselves.
My psyche is a mass-of-mess, and thus probably needs much more attention than most others’….
Hugs to you, too.
Mo,
Oh, don’t be sorry — you bring up important points!
Meditation is not easy for me, and I think it develops — there are many levels of calmness. You might want to try using headphones, either noise canceling one or for CD that comes with very calming natural sound / music. I’m not a big fan of guided meditation (with some exceptions) but some meditation music is nice.
Akemi, Thank you for the suggestions and encouragement. I think, as you alluded to, my mind has tended to find other ways to compensate, as I do have some unorthodox calming methods that now come almost without my intent – I just make a space in my head and it can do some of what it needs on it’s own, without my conscious intent. I sometimes need to “remember” to keep that space available, and this is really just enough to get me through the days.
I need a bit more to feel better, or even “good” (should that time ever come!), so I appreciate your input.
Mo,
You are so welcome.
I hope you feel wonderful soon! A space in the head . . . sounds good to me.
[...] As Akashic record reader and life coach, Akemi Gaines can help you improve your life and grow spiritually. She lives in Oregon, USA, but distance is not an issue for her reading. To learn more, check her website Akashic Record Reading. You might also want to subscribe to her blog, Yes to Me, to read articles like What’s The Best Thing That Can Happen? [...]
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Great post that I could not agree with anymore. Getting away and reinventing oneself is extremely important to me!
Jesse W.
http://www.subprimeblogger.com
Fantastic post. I can always count on my pets to help me soothe the tensions from a crappy day. Something about the unconditional love and affection they give that can just make other things not matter.
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I couldn’t agree more with the post above. Sometimes I, too, get bogged down in employee mentality. It’s very easy to do, and so insidious that it sneaks up on you when you think you have mastered it.
I dealt with this as I changed when I realised my life in Liverpool, England wasn’t working and moved to Chicago. Realised that I needed warmth and sunshine and moved to California.
And again when I became a massage therapist/bodyworker and entered the workforce. And it’s occurring now as I realise that I am meant to be an entrepreneur, not an employee.
I am currently building a private practice and an online business as of this writing. It’s scary and exciting. I’m having fun.
I need help ridding myself of this mentality. Does anyone have any tips on how to begin the journey from employee mentality to entrepreneur mentality? I’m open to useful suggestions.
.-= sean stargazer´s last blog ..Embracing Your Shadow Self =-.
Hi all,
Thank you for your sharings.
Sean,
I wrote a couple of articles about paycheck mentality on this blog last fall, so you might want to check the archive. Plus, my eBook Lightworker’s Guide to Self-Employment is coming soon (will be shared free)!
I think you are right.
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