Coaching The Freedom Of Self-Employment: Tom Volkar
November 5, 2008 by Akemi
We continue to interview inspiring and successful entrepreneurs here at Yes to Me, and this time, I didn’t have to look far for the perfect interview guest. Tom Volkar, Career Coach from CoreU Coaching and Delightful Work has been a steady commenter at Yes to Me. Just like myself, he helps new and aspiring entrepreneurs to have the business of their dreams. He recently made a community call, which attracted many bloggers. (Photo by leefotos)
1. Tell us a bit about your business and why you started it.
I began my career as a soloprenuer in 1998, first as an inspirational speaker and corporate vision consultant. This was soon after closing an earlier entrepreneurial, entertainment business that resulted in me losing everything, including my home. My marriage of 19 years ended then when I refused to go back to a 23-year career in sales.
Once again, on the trail of pursuing work that I loved, a guy came out of the audience, after a talk I’d given and asked if I’d ever done any coaching. I coached his wife on discovering career fulfillment and found it far more satisfying than speaking; thus my coaching business was born.
I started the speaking business because I valued doing what I loved more than anything. Yet if I hadn’t walked down the corridor of speaking, the coaching door may not have serendipitously opened.
CoreU Coaching was initially a life coaching business where I delivered every kind of coaching imaginable, including: corporate executives, relationship coaching and coaching for supervisors in manufacturing plants. But the clients, who always gave me the greatest thrills, were budding entrepreneurs who were preparing to make the leap to self-employment. So In September 07, I began writing my Delightful Work blog, which is dedicated to that community. I coach, write and create courses and programs to support those who want to be their own boss.
2. What were the three biggest challenges when you were starting off as a new entrepreneur?
My first entrepreneurial enterprise in 1992 was for a brick and mortar business. The challenges were different than for my coaching business. I successfully raised 2.5 million dollars, so it was necessary to get dozens of lenders, investors and vendors to buy into in my vision, since it was never done before. My biggest challenge in that business was in finding and presenting existing business models that gave these supporters confidence.
In my coaching business the challenges were more internal and consisted of trusting myself and working through the underlying fears that developed around the lack of time and money. In chronological order here were my biggest challenges.
- Not completely following my core values, allowed me to be lured by projects that looked financially promising but were not authentically aligned with who I was.
- I fought prevailing wisdom to niche myself for far too long because I thought it would limit the work I’d receive and cause me to earn less.
- I allowed my fear of learning technology to get in the way of my business growth.
3. And how did you work through these challenges?
Values Un-aligned Projects – I worked through this one the hard way, by continuing to say yes to opportunities that looked good but did not turn out well for me. If we beat our heads against the same wall long enough, the pain awakens us. Lesson learned: Not everything works for everyone in the same way. If you have to fight it to work it, the resistance will stop the money from flowing.
Committing to a Niche – After yet another misguided decision in challenge one, I finally said the hell with it and made a sacred vow to commit to marketing myself as an expert only in the area that brings me most alive. That is inspiring and encouraging the leap to the freedom of self-employment. Lesson learned: Committing to one niche does not limit the work we receive. I am still presented with opportunities to coach in other areas. But commitment allows us to approach mastery in the area we care about the most. And mastery leads to greater propsperity in fulfillment and in finances.
Fear of Technology – I worked through this fear using Emotional Freedom Technique and a decision-making technique that I learned in Eckhart Tolle’s, The Power of Now. Essentially I had to release limiting beliefs about my ability to learn technology, while at the same time accepting that the Internet had become an essential component of business building. Lesson Learned: Even though we are more naturally suited to learning some concepts than others. Our resistance is unnaturally created by fear not by original makeup.
4. What is the best part of being an entrepreneur for you?
Total autonomy is the best part of being an entrepreneur. I view employment as mental and emotional slavery. Each of us holds the key to remove our own shackles. Having the total freedom to decide what I work on, the projects I create, the self-determination to work when I feel like working and to work in service to who I most want to serve: that is the liberty of entrepreneurship that I hold most dear.
5. Any advice for people who dream to have their own business and yet find it hard to make the leap?
There are four essential realizations that are required understanding.
1). No one can build your unique business like you can. Your best guess about what that is, is far better than any outside expert’s opinion. Tap the expertise of those who have actually been in the arena, for their encouragement, methods and tools. But look to yourself in matters of decision-making.
2). Quit dreaming and thinking – instead act. Find a way to get into action, even if it’s part time. You cannot see what doors may open (like the doorway to my coaching) until you walk down the corridor. Get out of your own head and into action. You can always adapt on the fly. It may not seem comforting but no one ever figures it all out first. That’s a myth.
3). Carefully choose your sources of support. Advice from others, even from those who love you, needs to be taken with a grain of salt. They can’t see things from your perspective. They aren’t aware of your desires and strengths. No one else can intuitively understand what you know about yourself. For support, find a community of budding entrepreneurs who are feeling what you’re feeling.
4). Don’t let the search for the perfect pre-existing career slow you down. You may not find perfect, pre-existing, authentic work created by another. You may need to blend all of your special strengths, peculiarities and values together, to build your own empire.
My Takeaway
I totally agree with the importance of authenticity! I also like his advice on how to choose the supports and advice with care. The moral encouragement from friends and family is nice, but if they are not entrepreneurs themselves, do take it with a grain of salt. That kind of free advice can cost you a lot in terms of your time or missed opportunities. So thank them with grace, and find other entrepreneurs and real pros for advice.
If you like this article, you might enjoy my eBook on spiritual entrepreneurship. Click here for free, immediate download
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Great interview – I particularly liked the four subpoints under #5!
[...] Gaines of Yes To Me interviewed me for her Successful and Inspiring Entrepreneurs series. I share my story and startup realizations. [...]
Tom is an awesome coach. I took his 5-day business discovery telecourse, and it was a great affirming experience.
http://www.delightfulwork.com/business-discovery-group/
If you want to be free of paid slavery (I’m not saying all employment is like that, but many feel that way), then Tom can help you.
ari
Great interview with Tom
I love his down-to-earth practicality coupled with inspiration and instinct.
His 4-points are right on the mark.
Cheers,
Lorraine
“I fought prevailing wisdom to niche myself for far too long because I thought it would limit the work I’d receive and cause me to earn less.”
The three words that keep coaching professionals poor are, “I help everyone!”
As a public speaker, when you delivered your speeches, you didn’t talk to “everyone”. Instead, you picked out people in the audience with whom to make eye contact and “connect”. That’s because it’s SO HARD to “connect” with a mob – however it’s much easier to connect with individuals.
My biggest frustration in working with coaching clients is trying to get them to embrace this truth!!!
Akemi, thanks for an INSPIRING interview. Tom, thanks for sharing your story.
‘Carefully choose your sources of support’
On numerous occasions I have tried to describe what I was up to and why to friends, family and even colleagues. Often I received a blank stare or a “Huh?”
Thanks to Tom and the budding entrepreneurs I have met at Delightful Work, I feel heard – really heard at last. Yes, finding a community of those who share a passion for individualism and creative entrepreneur spirit is, in two words, Delightful Work!
Thanks Akemi for a great interview.
John
Hi Akemi & Tom,
GREAT interview. I love what Akemi took away — you cannot let other’s preconceived notions of what will happen slow you down!
I also like the point to stop dreaming and act and I think this slows a lot of people down. They want a clear map from point A to point Z and there is no way to foretell WHAT will happen in between those points. Get to Point B and THEN make a plan for point C and do it…. Waiting for it to “all become clear” will hold you back and will be met with disappointment when things “don’t go as planned”.
Thanks Tom & Akemi — 2 of my favorite bloggers together for a post — I LOVE when that happens!
Love,
Jenny
Great job Akemi.
Tom is my coach and his passion for helping others make the leap to self-employment has been a Godsend for me at this critical time in my life.
I’m so glad he conquered his tech fears and started his blog otherwise I may have never found him!
His words regarding total autonomy could have been taken right from my own heart.
Christines last blog post..Why Freedom is an Entrepreneur’s Most Treasured Value
Akemi – I’d like to first thank you for this opportunity to tell some of my story. You provide a great service here for budding entrepreneurs.
Steve – thanks, that was my favorite part as well without those realizations I’d be building much slower than I am.
Ari – thanks man. Awesome coaches often have awesome clients and you sure fit the bill!
Kathy – I know how frustrating that is for all of you marketing and web coaches because when we are niche-less it seems as though we don’t know what we want and that can be maddening. Thanks Kathy, I’m always delighted to inspire.
John – thanks for making the trip over and for your heartfelt words regarding the community at Delightful Work. This is how I described the community recently.
Delightful Work is the budding entrepreneurs Underground Railroad and a community halfway house to support small business owners who want more from life. Like here on Akemi’s blog, there is a connection that’s palpable.
Jenny – I love your take-away. It’s always interesting to see what will resonate with a reader. Thanks for taking the time to comment.
Christine – thank you, I’m so pleased I got over that as well. Most fears are nothing much once we just decide to move through them.
I’m pleased that our bond is our desire for autonomy.
Tom Volkar / Delightful Works last blog post..Do It Your Way
Tom, you have a healthy, happy relationship with Serendipity.
I always feel inspired by those who would have the courage to juggle the pain of loss with the promise of gain so that Serendipity might have her way with them.
Akemi, thank you for yet another great interview with success.
Christopher
Tom, I’m glad to read this interview. It’s nice to know how your journey has led you to specialize in the niche that spoke to you the most. You illustrated an example of how through a series of steps, you got closer and closer to the mark of what you really want to do at the core level.
Most of us don’t always start out all clear knowing exactly what we want deep down inside. But if we choose to seek and put ourselves on the path of authenticity, the grey clouds of obscurity will start to gradually part.
Hi Akemi, Hi Tom: What a great interview! I agree with Tom that employment is mental and emotional slavery, if you stay at a job longer than the time needed to achieve your well-defined purpose for getting that job. With the advancements in technology more and more people can now start their own one-man (one-woman) operations and work for themselves, therefore being masters of their own destiny and reaping full rewards for the results achieved by their creativity and productivity.
My gratitude to Tom for this great interview and to the readers for the thoughtful comments!
It was refreshing to read Tom’s story as a new coach. I just published my own 5 part series on how I started first as a coach and then adjusted that course to become a spiritual consultant, so the timing couldn’t have been better. I know firsthand his challenge of niche definition. And as some people pointed out, it is like making one step forward to see the next step.
Tom’s community building effort is very respectable. I urge everyone to check it out if you haven’t done so already.
I had already decided to take the plunge into entrepreneurship when I came across Tom. Even though I had plunged into the water, I was only ankle deep and had floaties on my arms. Tom helped me to take off the floaties and swim out into the deep end. He encouraged me and guided me all the way. I not only learned a lot from him but, with his authentic business class, I learned a lot from me about me. Now I am well on my way and totally loving every day of work. I am pumped and feeling the freedom that Tom speaks of. I feel passion toward my work and know there is an exciting road ahead of me. Tom has really impacted the rest of my life by helping me into the deeper water where I am now swimming freestyle. Being an entrepreneur is all that Tom says it is. Jump on in, the water’s fine!
Great interview Akemi and Tom. As someone who hopes to “remove my shackles” I always find it interesting to read stories of how other people did it. Like you suggest in point #2, I’m doing something I love part-time in the hopes it will be full-time.
PS – love the new design Akemi
Good interview Akemi.
@ Tom…. Knowing, Doing and Being… you’ve got what it takes! I enjoyed hearing your story.
Hi Akemi, Tom,
I really like this interview. “If we beat our heads against the same wall long enough, the pain awakens us.” Gee, that spoke volumes to me. Like Peter, I’m also working towards “removing my shackles” within a specific timeline … so I guess I will be needing some serious coaching soon enough!
Christopher – Thomas Leonard always said that serendipity was the intersection of
you and opportunity. When I began to look at it that way, closing doors always held more promise for me.
Evelyn – The next step although never obvious was usually a necessity for me. So I could wallow about in self-pity or get up and try something else. We have amazing capacities to adapt when we have to.
Marelisa – Break those chains – YES! The Internet has leveled the playing field and the only obstacles we really face are those of our own making.
Akemi – Thanks again for this opportunity to talk self-employment with your readers. I’ve always been impressed with how quickly you ve identified you niche adjustments and then moved forward.
Laurie – You’re such a delightful entrepreneur! You carry the flag of freedom high so that others can feel its touch and rally around!
Peter – It sounds as though you are right where you need to be. From here just keep setting more aggressive milestones to hit and you’ll be there before you know it.
Irene – I hope your head doesn’t hurt too much.
Like I told Peter, as long as you’ve back-planned and are hitting regular milestones you’ll be fine. Let me know when you want to accelerate your progress, I’d be honored to help.
It’s always so inspiring to hear stories like these – thank you for this interview!
Akemi, you picked a winner to interview here – Tom is awesome and you did him justice with some great questions!
Tom – Great, honest answers to these questions – what I’m particularly drawn to is the fact that you talked not only about what works, but also what hasn’t worked for you.
And, based upon my own personal interactions with you, Tom – I truly believe you have found your niche – your passion for what you do runs deep! And, it been a pleasure learning a bit more about you here…
Sharon – To inspire is one of the four core values that I live my life by. t feels good to see that it’s shining through.
Lance – You are too kind buddy. I appreciate the recognition. Authentic transparency is were we all need to get to and that includes our stumbles and our fears. As far as my passion and my niche, yep for now I’ve hit the sweet spot but at the same time I remain open to whatever unknowns may come.
Hi Akemi. Hi Tom. Loved the interview and I enjoyed finding out more about Tom and what brought him to where he is today. I really appreciate how he talked about his own struggles doing work that didn’t feel right and his own resistance to his purpose an passion for working with entrepreneurs. I think it’s empowering to hear how people have transcended their own fears to build lives and businesses we look up to. It isn’t easy for anyone to be an authentic success and sometimes I think we can get so caught up in beating ourselves up over our own ‘failings’ we forget everyone struggles at times and that gradual learning is what life is all about.
Thanks.
Kelly
Kelly – I appreciate you taking the time to read this interview and for mentioning what resonates with you. We are all one at the deepest level and whatever comes up when reading about another is connected to feelings we have about ourselves. I can feel your warmth and sincerity. Thank you.
[...] I started this post over a week ago and in the interim there have been interviews with Tom by two different fellow bloggers. Akemi Gaines, Spiritual Consultant, interviewed Tom on Entrepreneurship. You can read this interview at: http://yes-to-me.com/2008/11/05/coaching-the-freedom-of-self-employment-tom-volkar/ [...]
[...] of the Yes to Me blog interviewed Tom Volkar. From the interview at Coaching The Freedom Of Self-Employment: Tom Volkar In my coaching business the challenges were more internal and consisted of trusting myself and [...]