How To Pray
February 2, 2010 by Akemi

Prayer is an effective way to communicate your intention to Divinity. Unfortunately, however, some of us never learned how to pray, and some have been put off by the dogmatic approach of religion and are confused about prayers. So here is the basic of how to pray. (Photo credit)
Format of a prayer
In The Divine Matrix: Bridging Time, Space, Miracles, and Belief, Gregg Braden analyzes the three-part sandwich format of a prayer:
- Opening
- Body
- Closing
He explains how prayer works as the command code in the matrix, just as a piece of computer code works in the computer software. (For more about the nature of this matrix, you might want to read his The Spontaneous Healing of Belief, too.)
I know a few very basic codes. For example, when I want to bold words in this blog, this is what I write:
<strong>the text I want to bold</strong>
As you see, it has three parts:
- Opening: <strong>
- Body
- Closing: </strong>
The function of the opening is to signal the system that I am going to make a certain request. Then I state what it is in the body. Finally, I mark where my body ends with the closing.
Prayer has the same format. In the opening, I call to the Divinity to signal that I am going to make a certain request. Then I state my request in the body. Finally, I close my prayer to signal this is the end of my prayer.
Asking requires faith
Prayer is not just chatting with Divinity or spirit guides. When we pray, we make requests. And let me assure you there is nothing wrong about asking for what you sincerely desire. In fact, the Universe is waiting for you to make requests. (The key word here is “sincerely”. I am not talking about satisfying every whim you feel when you go to the mall.)
Why doesn’t the Universe (or God or Matrix or whatever you want to call) just give you what you want? Is it too dump to figure out what you want? Why do you have to bother and pray?
Because you have a free will and all positive beings respect free will. God / angels / spirit guides are not going to shove you what they think is best for you. It’s your responsibility to decide what you want and ask.
Asking requires at least some faith. If you absolutely don’t think you can get what you want, you won’t bother to ask. Even a very hungry little boy won’t ask for a candy if he absolutely knows there is no candy in the house and his family is so poor that there is no way his parents can buy him a candy. Asking for something you know you won’t get is stupid and no one would do it.
So prayers — not the prayers you just say out of habit or sense of obligation, but the real prayers in which you ask for something — require faith, the belief that you would, or at least might, get it. This is the beauty of prayers. By praying, you reinforce your faith in a power greater than yourself.
Name of Divinity
So, a typical opening is the calling of Divinity. If you are comfortable with the word “God”, you can use it here. You can also use the name of God you believe in such as Jesus.
But what if you don’t like any organized religion and not comfortable with the word “God”? Can you still pray? Definitely. Prayer is simply a request to higher power. You can be creative in the way you call your Divinity. Here are some ideas:
- My higher power
- Creator of all beings
- Universe
- Nature
- Great spirit(s)
- God of my understanding
- Divine intelligence
- Divine mother / father
You can also call multiple names of Divinity, such as adding the names of saints you like.
The body of a prayer
Then you state your request, or your intention. Make it clear, straightforward, and complete. Don’t beg nor bargain. Your prayer can be long, and you can take time “listening” to the response to your request before closing, or you can “hold” the intention for a period of time, but don’t nag.
Begging means you don’t really believe in the benevolent nature of God nor your own self-worth to have what you are asking for. Perhaps you had to do that to get a candy from your parent, but God is a bit different from your parent. Begging in the prayer defies the basic point of praying, that you have faith in the chance you will get what you want. Same with bargaining — you don’t do that if you believe in the infinite wisdom and power of God.
Many people have problem communicating in a clear, straightforward and complete manner even with people, so I know this takes practice. But it’s worth practicing.
Closing the prayer
Closing can be quite simple. In my case, I say either something like, “I entrust this prayer to be answered in a way that is best for me and for all beings everywhere.” or simply, “Thank you. Amen.” You can also repeat the name of Divinity before saying the gratitude.
Surrender
Then comes the challenging part. You need to release the prayer. In other words, you surrender. You don’t hold your breath watching out when and how your prayer is answered, or even if it ever be answered.
Some prayers are answered immediately. Some takes time. And some appear to be never answered. For instance, you may pray that your loved one survive a terminal illness and they may die after all.
I believe prayers work in a way that is best for all beings involved, not just for my personal (and often temporary) satisfaction. In the aforementioned example, perhaps it is time for your loved one to go. Death is nothing to be ashamed of — it’s a transformation process. Of course it’s sad because it is about separation, but maybe you have grown strong enough to go through this sad experience. So the request you made in the prayer is not granted, but if you are open, you would be comforted. And years later, you may be surprised how the loss contributed to your spiritual growth.
We don’t always know what is best for us. This is why we want to surrender our prayer to Divinity. You want to express what you desire, but you don’t want to control it. God cannot work on your prayer if you keep holding onto it.
Do you pray? Do you have any questions about prayers? Please let me know in the comment. Thank you.
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“Pray uncessingly,” one of my long-time heroines Rachel Naomi Remens once wrote. Your article is a clear and instructive lesson for praying. I especially appreciate and have found to be true: the gods love to be asked, wait to be asked. It’s fun to think of the three-part structure of prayer being like a wonderfully hand-written letter.
“Dear God,”
“Please hear my prayer. I need your help with …”
“Thank you,”
Mokihana
Akua (my source of higher power) does listen to my prayers; the kind you write about here … the ones fueled by faith. This is such a nice way to begin February, the month of Aquarius the water-bearer offering enlightenment thank you for this post.
Thanks for providing this guide. I pray frequently, but never knew exactly how to do it until now.
grapeshot´s last blog ..So This Is Christmas
Mokihana and grateshot,
You know, I wrote this article a little while ago, and I’ve been praying for a few things myself. I’ve had a few brilliant guidance in the last 24 hours. Prayers work!
Akemi,
thanks for posting this. Though not religious, I’m teaching my sensitive child to pray as a way to cope with this volatile world.
Would it be better to prep before praying? For example clearing cluttered mind or distraction?
Akemi,
THANK YOU!!! This insight comes at a critical time for me and my sister. Both of us have been “praying” for transition and wondering why “nothing” is happening. I had the thought the other day, how come I pray and pray every day and nothing is happening? Having been raised in a very strict dogmatic christian structure, prayer often seems a chore that we plod along in to “please” God. Thank you again for this insight. God bless you.
Fran
WL,
Well, it would be better for our own sake to prep not for God or spirit guides. So if you feel better that way, great. I’d pray even if the room is messy, though.
Fran,
You are welcome and good luck!
Thank you for posting this! I was put off by a dogmatic, cultist religion I grew up in and praying hasn’t been in my vocabulary in a very long time. Thank you for point out that praying doesn’t have to be tied to a particular religion.
Carla´s last blog ..Drowning
I also thank you for this post.
Interestingly, I have had the exact same past upbringing with the comment above from Carla, which by the way is my name.
Coinicendence? Hmmmm……
Blessings,
Carla Rose
Carla, I guess it depends on the religion.

Carla´s last blog ..Drowning
To both Carla,
Glad I could help. The trauma of fear-based religion is very harmful in many ways. I am not against religions, but when I think of the negative effects they are doing to people, I am very concerned.
Akeim,
I agree with your comment. I know that belief systems whether negative or positive there is always a choice, it depends on the souls determination/blueprint. It took years of spiritual soul work to repair the damage to my own soul from the circumstances my upbringing consisted of. Forgiveness and letting go are the *keys* of understanding, then and only then will the surface thin so that the repair can then begin.
Additionally, I think the “negative effects” that produce are opportunities for the souls growth. I understand the concern and share this, though I know it is all part of the divine souls plan.
Blessings to you~
Carla Rose
carla´s last blog ..Birth Day Remembrance