Why I Died At Age Four
June 16, 2009 by Akemi Gaines
Even when you believe in the eternity of your soul (or Higher Self), the fear of death and the impact of losing your loved ones are huge. I understand this. I read people’s soul records (Akashic Records) every day and have seen many past life deaths and reincarnations, but when I hear someone talk about actual death, there is not much I can say or do but offer my love to them.
In this post, I’d like to share one of my past life (again, the one before my Ascension soul shift) in which I died at the tender age of four. Perhaps it sheds some light about this sensitive issue about dealing with death, especially death of a young person. (Photo by sugarmonster)
Choosing birth setting in the cycle of reincarnation
I don’t remember exactly how I died. The point is I opted out early from that life because it wasn’t what I, as spirit, expected.
What went wrong? Was I abused and couldn’t take it any longer? Was I so ill that I chose to end life earlier than expected? Was I poor and starved, or was there a war?
Nope. On the contrary, I was born to a loving and affluent family. I was their precious only child. They wanted to shower me with all the love and care, and whatever money could buy. I think, by the time I was a four-year-old girl, they were dreaming up of my big wedding.
And that was the problem.
There was hardly any challenge.
We all choose our birth setting prior to life. Often, we dare to choose difficult situation to be born to because we believe it offers better learning opportunities for our life lessons. This is not always the case, however. Spirits honor our free will, so if we insist on being born to a certain setting, they let us do so. They may say something like, “Honey, you may not like that situation. It doesn’t align with your learning process.” but if you insist, they will let you do that. We have the right to learn by trial and error.
So evidently I chose this rich and loving family. I guess I was tired of tough life like the one that ended up with cruel persecution.
. . . and I quickly found out the advice of the counseling spirits was right. Again, this life as the only child of an affluent family was . . . boring. Perhaps the only way I could learn something in that setting was to run off with a guy from a different race and social status. But I didn’t like spending more than ten years growing up just to get to the point of potentially doing something like that. So I opted out. Sorry my mom and dad of that lifetime . . .
Is Lamborghini for everyone?
Let me explain by analogy. Do you want Lamborghini? It’s a nice sports car, isn’t it? Would you like to drive that if it was up to your choice?
Me choosing that rich family to be born to was like me choosing to drive a Lamborghini. The spirits told me I may not like it, but I insisted because it looked nice. And my friend Hunter told me it’s nice. So I wanted to try.
Now in real life at the car dealership, something would happen that would prevent me to actually buy a Lamborghini. Perhaps I’d notice it makes horrible engine noise as I test drive. Plus I’d notice I was getting unwanted attention. (I don’t like getting attention for the car I drive. I want attention to myself). So I’d walk off without buying it. Good grief.
In reincarnation, however, there is no test drive. So I dived into that experience. And quickly realized I messed up. Again, my mistake. No one did anything wrong.
The lesson
Does this mean all the children who die are choosing their own destiny to opt out? No. Does it mean it’s no good to give love and material gifts to children? No.
What I’m getting at with this story is that there may be a hidden meaning. Again, I know losing a loved one is tough. It’s essential we take good care of ourselves in such times. And, when you start feeling better, maybe you can regain the trust that things are working fine.
Here is another story I heard from a friend. Her friend gave birth to a baby who had birth defect. Doctors told her to institutionalize the baby because he wasn’t going to do anything and would die soon anyway. She was determined to take care of the baby herself and to prove them wrong.
The baby did achieve some development and surprised the doctors. Then, one winter morning, she was driving her kids to somewhere, and another car slipped and hit her car. The other car hit right to the side where that baby was seated, and he died instantly. Magically, she and her other (normal) kids didn’t get hurt at all.
After grieving, she realized that the baby caused the accident himself to leave this world. It was time for him to go — he appreciated his mother’s love and care, but he also knew he wasn’t going to be much more than he already was, and wanted to leave so that he could have another fresh start at some point of time later. The mother was sad, but she came to accept this.
I hope this article offer some help and release for those who suffer from the loss of their children and those who are perplexed with the issue of children’s deaths. If you know such person, please email them the link to this article.
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I just finished an excellent book called “Children’s Past Lives” by Carol Bowman and I highly, highly recommend it. I see that you already have a recommendation for Brian Weiss’ book – that’s good because after I read that, I was led to Carol’s book and I loved it. It made everything make sense – children actually can recall past lives if given the opportunity.
Hi Akemi – this is an interesting idea and I guess it’s quite possible that you and the other child deliberately died. But I’m really struggling to truly believe any of this, or even in God right now.
I really want to believe but I find it difficult because there’s no real evidence. And I know many people have had these experiences and say they remember them. But we can’t know that it’s just their mind playing tricks on them.
Stephen,
That sounds like a good book. I’m glad there are so many good books on soul records and reincarnation that educates us all. The idea of reincarnation and past life is certainly getting more popular.
Cath,
I understand your hesitation. Most past life memories cannot be “proven”, except rare case like the one in YouTube in this post. But we know because we resonate — deep inside, we know our truth with or without evidence.
Hearing about past Akemi dying at age 4 still makes me sad. Your past parents didn’t know you wanted out. If only there was a way to tell them that you’re OK and you got what you wanted.
Akemi,
I have a question from The Lesson, in which you wrote: “After grieving, she realized that the baby caused the accident himself to leave this world. It was time for him to go — he appreciated his mother’s love and care, but he also knew he wasn’t going to be much more than he already was, and wanted to leave so that he could have another fresh start at some point of time later.”
Is it possible someone would choose to leave not in regard to themselves & their learning, but chose to leave for the betterment of others? Are their decisions based totally on themselves or is love & consideration toward others involved?
Thank you.
Hunter,
You are such a sweetheart. Well, I guess they could hire a psychic who specializes in talking with the dead . . .
I think most (if not all) souls are “OK” after death. It’s the survivors who get crashed. Because while we are here, we are attached to this world.
Regarding getting what I wanted — oh, boy, did I get the challenges I wanted. I still went ahead with the plan to run off with a guy of different race. (My ex was white.)
Isabel,
Hmm, I guess that is possible. Like this case with the disabled baby is also about his love for his mother and siblings.
I forgot to mention that some miscarriages and deaths of small children (esp infants) are due to the — how can I say — developmental issue for the soul attempting to incarnate. I mean, it’s a lot of work for the soul to incarnate. Miss a few steps, and the physical body can suffer fatal issue. I heard these souls who couldn’t really make it at their earlier attempts come back for another try . . .
[...] I distressed my past life parents when I died at the tender age of four. I’m [...]
Akemi, I had a feeling that Gaines wasn’t a Japanese name!
[...] to the idea of past life regression. So, Akemi Gaines told me to check out the amazing video about past live regression. And I was so intrigued that I also watched these past life regression [...]
It is painful for people to lose children, especially if the children are young. It seems so pointless for all of us from one perspective. There are certain mysteries that can sometimes be explained with past life therapy. Holding in our hearts that there is a bigger plan and we can know at times helps us let go of our own will. Let’s remember we co-create our lives and part of our spiritual growth is to surrender to the larger mystery.
Thank you
Dr. Jennifer Howard
This reminds of something I thought of a while ago. I realized that when some people like young men die it always seems that eveyone around them feels it was bad timing. These young men have all usually begun to get their lives together and get on a good track. SUDDENLY they are gone. It occurred to me that they had learned what they needed to know and moved on. They had reached their peak. Does that make sense? It’s similar right?
[...] in a way that doesn’t really fit our disposition nor our learning plan — like this. But that’s okay, [...]
Good Day Everyone,
Well, it is very interesting to see how a soul can decide to check out like that
without going through the process of suicide… I mean, I understand that all time are simultaneous and that I probably already decided when I would died if the dynamic of this actual life keep going the same way (Which I already decided by the way, since I know when I will die).
The question I have is: Do we choose before we are moving in the new body like we got a sneak peak of what was going to happen and we said alright, that time should be great… Are we choose (if we do choose) as we go along and at some point, it is clear that the mission is over and this time the we need to leave ?
Another question that might be not so relevant is… does everybody I mean everybody (every souls) are tight up with the same rules ? For example, I am a mission realmer, do I have the same rule as a Human Soul ?, am I part of a soul group, do I have predetermined mission ? It is very confusing, because I personally never felt much free will in my life (lives). Thanks Guys !!! Cheer Stefany xoxoxo