Embrace The Big Questions Worth Spending Your Life For
June 9, 2008 by Akemi Gaines
Are you addicted to the quick and easy answers?
We live in the world of instant gratification. Huge questions of love and life are solved usually within 90 minutes in the movie. There are numerous websites that offer answers of all kinds. Or you can just type a question like “What is the meaning of life?” in Google search box. (Seriously – if you haven’t done this yet, try it and see what you get.)
I’m afraid so many people are getting conditioned to this quick and easy answer system that they have largely given up their right and responsibility to seek answers themselves. I was alarmed when I did the key word research for my article The One Word That’s Sucking Up Your Energy Right Now. Here are some of the questions people often ask to Google using this dis-empowering word SHOULD:
- Who should I vote for?
- Where should I live?
- What career should I choose?
- Who should a Gemini date? *
- Should I stay with my boyfriend?
- What should I do with my life?
- What should I make for dinner?
- What should I write on a headstone?
(* Apparently, Geminis ask this “Who should a (zodiac) date?” question most often, followed by Sagittarius. I’m a Gemini myself, but I have no idea why this is so. Do other Geminis really think the internet can answer this question?)
How the quick and easy answers steal your joy and peace.
Let’s say you ask “What career should I choose?” and Google or your career counselor tells you, probably based on some personality or talent tests, that you should become a teacher. So you become one. Do you think you will be happy and confident with your career? Teaching, like any other professions, comes with lots of challenges – your teenage students are distracted and rebellious, administrators are demanding, and there are so many things to do – and the pay isn’t very good. So?
I’m not saying the teaching is not a good profession. The problem in this example is that the foundation of your choice to become a teacher is so weak. On the other hand, I know several people who left high income jobs to go back to school and became teachers. They chose the teaching career because, through their own experiences and search for the meaningful life, they came to realize they wanted to teach. They are happy with their choice because it is a choice they made consciously. And they have peace in them.
My friend Ken beautifully wrote about the joy we find in our life journey in How I Traded My Life For Future Security And How I’m Getting It Back. Again, the search for answer is as valuable as arriving at the answer.
The more challenging the game, the more fun.
There are cases for quick and easy answers. When I buy an electronic gadget, I want to start using it right away. Reading the long manual is no fun, and I really like it when it comes with “Quick Start” instructions. I can learn about additional features later. For now, I want to get things done with this new gadget and then go out for a walk.
But our life is not like stuffs we buy for consumption. We are in life – where do you want to go after you save time and energy by getting the quick and easy answers on critical questions of your life?
Further, just like certain games, life is more fun with challenges. Ask yourself – do you enjoy a game that you know so well and are 100% sure to win, to the point that you know exactly how you win and finish the game? Would you even bother playing it?
Enjoy bearing the big questions.
Recently, I was exchanging emails with Steve at Brip Blap about I Have A Dream . . .. This article did fine as a blog post, but as a meme, it was a total failure. No one sent me articles. Steve asked me if it’s too late to submit his article, so I replied, “You are welcome to participate any time, but let me ask you – do you think the project was too grandiose? Or did I not market it enough?” He says that the project is great but it does take some time to write because it requires good thinking. And in this busy world, few people takes time to think even when they know it is something worth thinking.
Hmm. . . How can I make sense of this? I conclude it was great if the post inspired some people to think about the big dreams of life. It’s okay they didn’t get the answers quickly. Keep asking yourself the big questions.
It’s not just the question of your dream. Find and embrace big questions that are worth spending your life for. Carry the questions, check back often, while you live and enjoy your journey.





“…And in this busy world, few people takes time to think even when they know it is something worth thinking.”
I might add: in this chaotic world, few people can think about worthwhile topics because they are literally in Shock !
~ Alex
I was just thinking about “should” this weekend as to how I also felt it was the most disempowering word… ever. This is very synchronous.
If people just spent more time tuning into their heart and emotions, then the “should” drops away and what we are left with is the truth of our experience.
I will be the first to admit that the “truth” can be scary. The truth is pushing me to change careers, and my mind is holding onto the illusion of financial security with a fierceness like I’ve never known.
I “should” change careers. No, wait. I “should” listen to my heart to see what is true and let it lead me. No, wait.
Instead, I will just be true to myself and see what emerges. Who knows?
Alex,
Hi, thank you for stopping by.
Chris,
Good to see you again! You are becoming an entrepreneur? Welcome to the club!
Here is another article on SHOULD — funny you mentioned synchronicity because I commented the same there. Slade writes some interesting posts on spirituality:
What Should I Do?
I have always been an entrepreneur at heart… whether I was negotiating an allowance raise with my father, or scalping Barbara Streisand or Sharks tickets as a young teen who couldn’t even drive.
However, now I am moving into the online entrepreneurship world. I’m getting ready to launch my first ebook “How to Write Short Stories for Spiritual Growth,” and also am building a network of spiritually oriented websites.
I also plan at some point to offer internet marketing coaching and products targeted towards smaller businesses… probably spiritually / alternative oriented businesses specifically. (This last part is still under consideration)
So I do have a lot of things in the works – I’m just seeing where my heart leads me, and ultimately I know it is leading me away from my corporate dayjob and into the vast reaches of online entrepreneurship.
Chris,
Sounds exciting. Let me know if I can help you in some way.
It’s very exciting! I’ll definitely let you know if anything arises (especially since we’re both in the same area – I’m in Vancouver WA).
And it is very synchronous your post and Slade’s… I do check out Slade’s site sometimes, and hopped on over to check out the post you mentioned. Thanks for sharing!
Hi Akemi,
Love this post! It’s true that sometimes we go for the “easy” answer. Unfortunately, that “answer” tends to bring us anything BUT ease and joy. It’s only when we dig into our own Truth and allow our own inner wisdom to shine, I think, that our answers are transformed into fulfilling lifetimes.
Then again – if we know how to look, our own inner wisdom can be “easy” to access. So maybe it’s not about ease, but whether we look on the inside – or turn to some expert or external authority to tell us what to think or do.
Blessings,
Andrea
Andrea Hess | Empowered Soul Blogs last blog post..Developing Intuition: The Mind Trap
Chris,
We are like neighbors! I moved to this area last October, and haven’t made it to Washington state yet, but I will soon.
Andrea,
Gee, I temporarily forgot you, my mentor, reads this blog, too. . .
Seeking the answers within us is so important. When we do this, we get into our intuition, our spiritual side, sooner or later even if the person is very much into thinking in the first place.
I totally agree with you – the easy answers regarding life rob us out of our happiness. I notice that I only get excited when I’m going after big, massive goals that I know will take a long time to achieve. It’s like, I know the journey is going to be amazing, exciting, and thrilling… so why would I want to settle for anything less than that, when I know I have it in me to achieve what I set out to do?
Matt @ Face Your Forks last blog post..Taking Inspired Action Towards Your Goals
Matt,
I agree. The EZ method has gotten too much. In other words, we are just so afraid of failures. Failures don’t hurt so much when it actually happens — the fear about failure is far more than the failure.
Akemi,
I moved to Vancouver WA in June… so we’re both going through our first winter here
On the failure discussion, two of my favorite quotes are “The fear of failure is the death of success.” and “You only fail when you don’t get back up.”
I certainly learn 10 times more from a failure than from a success… in my experience, success is evidence of growth and “failure” is opportunity for growth.
Chris,
I learned a new word recently: June-uary. Can’t believe it’s not even 50 degrees F.
“The fear of failure is the death of success.” So true.
I certainly haven’t changed my mind in the last couple of days, either – one of the great challenges in life is to tackle tough subjects/goals/projects/etc. when the medium and low-difficulty stuff is so overwhelming in the first place. Finding time to write or share thoughts on meaningful subjects is often incredibly hard when you have to do the laundry, remember to send that birthday card to Aunt Ethel, help your kids get dressed, find your keys, etc. The easiest thing is to set the harder stuff aside and at least keep afloat with the simpler things.
My biggest fear, of course, is that in not tackling the “big things” I make my life all about the small things. Now, there’s no dishonor in being in the moment and cleaning my bathroom to a shine, but it cannot be the end-all of existence (although maybe from a Zen point of view, it could be). Muscles don’t grow without being applied to some stress from heavier weights, and spirits don’t grow by hammering away at the easy tasks.
good article!
Steve
Hmmm this strikes a personal chord. Just yesterday I googled “Best college major”, after one of my friends told me that “business” majors were worthless. I was looking for confirmation from the world that it wasn’t worthless, and I felt better when I was able to find multiple business related degrees on various “Top Ten” lists. Seems I was looking for confirmation in the wrong places, and as long as I enjoy what I am doing, (and it is not illegal), it shouldn’t matter what others think. Thanks for reminding me!
Tages last blog post..Your money or your life.
Steve,
So true. I believe in living in the here and now, too, as Zen masters teach us, but I don’t think it is meant to be an excuse of avoiding the big questions.
It sounds like you are right in the middle of the busiest time of life. Take it easy — I think “carrying” the big questions is as important as answering them.
Tage,
You got it! Someone says business major is worthless? Worthless in doing what? To get a good job? And what kind of career are you after? Is business major useful in that career you are considering? And are you learning in your business classes? These are more meaningful questions, I think. Glad you realized to base your decision on yourself.
Steve,
“Spirits don’t grow by hammering away at the easy tasks.”
Try scrubbing toilets for days… instead of minutes. If that doesn’t force your spirit to grow, I don’t think anything will
I got to admit that I wanted to submit an article for your “I have a dream” post. But yes…it was not easy to turn it into a full length article. I usually keep article ideas until I have more inspired things to say, before it gets written.
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